here to heal podcast, episode 5: healing in relationship: concepts of adult attachment theory

We all have patterns in relationships—some of them are easier for us to spot than others. Have you ever wondered where these patterns come from or why it’s so hard to change them? In today’s solo episode, I’m talking all about the concepts of adult attachment theory. From the anxious style to the avoidant style to the style we are all working toward (secure!), we are covering the basics of relationships patterns in order to support one another in amplifying what’s working and switching up what doesn’t.

here to heal podcast, episode 4: my personal healing process

On today’s episode, I am sharing my healing journey and what healing means to me. I take you through my tangle with cancer at 21, facing my own mortality, moving across the country for graduate school, the loss of my father, my commitment to social justice, my healing and how I am continuing to heal.

The Here to Heal Podcast is LIVE!

I am so excited to share that the Here to Heal podcast is LIVE! I have already experienced so much joy in creating these episodes. Some of them are solo episodes where you will hear my reflections on attachment, connection, and community. The others are interviews with INCREDIBLE guests who are not only doing amazing work in the world but are also real people engaged in their healing work. It is such an honor to learn more about their experiences and the ways that they have shown up for themselves and their communities.

here to heal podcast, episode 3: moving through discomfort toward joy + liberation with bianca gragg, lcswa

Today I am talking with Bianca Gragg, LCSWA (she/her). Bianca is a community member and revolutionary mother in Asheville NC. Born and raised in the border city of El Paso Texas, Bianca has ancestral roots in Mexico, Germany, and Spain and identifies as part of the Latinx community.

here to heal podcast, episode 2: principles of healing

In this episode, I’m sharing the principles of healing I use in my therapy practice and daily life! These principles capture the important aspects of healing and remind us that we are all here to heal--regardless of where we’ve been or what we’ve experienced.

here to heal podcast, episode 1: welcome to the here to heal podcast!

Welcome to the here to heal podcast! I’m so excited because today we are launching the show and diving into deep healing work together. Please join me as I share my passion for healing work and my vision for the here to heal podcast.

How is your relationship with yourself?

I’m wrapping up my month focused on pleasure and I’ve learned a LOT over the past several weeks. Choosing pleasure allowed me to direct my energy toward what I could change rather than what I couldn’t. Choosing pleasure in and of itself allowed me to feel more satisfied and content.

Elizabeth GilletteJune 2, 2019pleasure, pleasure activism, healing, growth, learning, attachment theory, connectionComment

Being Gentle with Yourself as You Grow

There is something many of my clients realize once we start really digging in to relationship and self work: it doesn’t feel very good.

On one hand, I don’t enjoy seeing people experiencing discomfort or big emotions (I have had to learn to hold space for this and allow it instead of rescuing or fixing). But on the other hand, I have realized that the place where emotions are flowing and discomfort is welcomed and old hurts are received instead of pushed away is where the healing happens. Healing is feeling it all and changing your relationship with your feelings.

Why I'm Choosing Pleasure This Month

I have been reading Pleasure Activism by adrienne maree brown and once again, her work is turning my world upside down. I realize I have so much to learn and question and that’s a really good thing. She outlines the many elements and aspects of pleasure (which is often associated with sex and sexuality, but actually extends far beyond those) and ways we can increase our sense of pleasure, joy, love, and connection.

What does real healing look like?

One of the things I have learned from my therapy practice is that every single person has a story of healing. Even if they are in the midst of a difficult experience or transition, they are on their way to feeling whole and healed. These stories deserve space to be heard fully and explored deeply. The stories of others inform our own healing. When I’m going through something difficult and I hear from someone that they have navigated a similar challenge in a way that I never considered, I am able to move forward with new perspective and most importantly, more hope. When I hear that someone has done this before, I feel more confident that I can do it, too.

I want to share what real healing looks like. And to do that, I’m creating a podcast.

A Brief Guide to New Relationships for the Anxious Attachment Style

I want to acknowledge that even though I speak a lot to navigating established relationships with long-term partners, I see MANY people in my practice who are not currently partnered. Their goals are often to work through their old patterns so they can show up in new relationships in a grounded, clear, and confident way. So this week, I want to share more about that experience (as it can be nervewracking and overwhelming for folks—because dating is HARD!) and provide some support, specifically for people with the anxious attachment style.

How to Tell an Avoidant Person That They're Avoidant

This blog post has been highly requested and I’m happy to share some insight into this tricky dynamic and shed some light on why it can be challenging to have conversations about our attachment styles in the beginning stages of learning about attachment theory—especially if we have an attachment style that is designed to protect us and reduce the impact of interactions that cause us to feel out of control or overwhelmed. Of course, this doesn’t mean the conversation won’t be uncomfortable (it probably will be to some degree), but remember that the emotional response from the person is more about their own experiences and less about you.

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